Why we feel chronically unworthy and how to heal that for good

Let’s talk about worthiness! Aleah has been invited as an expert to the “You Are Enough!” summit with Pia Prana Muggerud where she speaks about why we chronically feel unworthy and how to heal that for good. In this episode Aleah will exclusively pre-answer one of the core questions of the interview. Furthermore she invites Pia Prana on the show to talk about the upcoming summit, why you should participate and what you will get out of it. Sign up today – it’s free AND comes with many amazing gifts and take aways. Aleah also provides her new ebook called “How to heal for good with 0% spiritual bypassing”. Besides, Aleah and her Business Partner, Dan Hart, are just about to launch their new brand The Royal Path, for you to burn your childhood trauma and rise like Phoenix from the ashes of your old self!

—

If you want more on getting the best out of your life and relationships, check out our new brand The Royal Path where you find everything about personal growth, deep healing and emotional liberation.

—

Listen to the podcast here:

You Are Enough! Why We Feel Chronically Unworthy And How To Heal That For Good

Welcome my dear listeners, finally, to a new episode on the Addicted To Love Podcast. If you already thought that this was it with the show (as I launched my last episode in Spring this year), then let me tell you that nothing can be further from the truth. 2020 was a crazy year and yet, it has brought me so many amazing things. I found epic love, I am just about to officially launch my new brand theroyalpath.com and I had incredibly powerful coaching & therapy mandates where I got to witness so much healing, expansion, and growth.

I will talk about it all in detail in the coming episodes, but today I wanted to hop on to make a big announcement for you. From the 1st until the 15th of December a powerful summit will be held online, called “You are enough!” hosted by Pia Prana Muggerud who will jump on this episode in just a couple of minutes to tell us all about the summit. She invited me as a speaker and of course, I said yes. Feeling worthy is something we Love Addicts tend to struggle with, and so I chose to speak about “Why we all feel chronically unworthy and how to heal that for good”.

I want to give you a little preview here exclusively and speak about one core question I got asked at the summit and then I will talk with Pia Prana about what is actually going to happen in the summit and why it will be valuable especially for the listeners of my show. So, make sure to sign up for the summit, you find the link in the show notes, but here it is and bear with me: https://piaprana.mykajabi.com/a/38938/TUwSDmR4

I Found Epic Love!

And in the next episode I will talk to you about how I found epic love as I am really deeply happy at this point in my love life and I know that If I was able to find it, you will too. That’s why you should stick with this show because from now on I will not only talk about love addiction and how to heal it, but how to find epic love and sustain it. But more in the coming episodes about that. So why do so many of us struggle with unworthiness? Why don´t we ever feel enough?

Not feeling good enough and even unworthy is one of the consequences of a (childhood) trauma that we, at The Royal Path, call this trauma “the early absence of secure love”, which ultimately results in the so-called Psychological Mother Wound. The Psychological Mother Wound (which shall not to be confused with Bethany Websters Mother Wound), basically is about how emotionally attuned our mother was towards us.

The relationship with our mother is the most primary and foundational relationship in our life. Click To Tweet

The Impact Of Our Mother’s Mothering And How That Can Make Us Feel Unworthy

We need to understand that her mothering had a huge impact on how we learn to trust ourselves, others and life as well as on how worthy or unworthy we feel. Mother is truly important because during our time in the womb, but also after being born, we are not even a separate entity, we are in a symbiotic bonding with mother and fully dependent on her for our emotional and physical survival.

The child needs his or her mother without a doubt more than the father in the first couple of years as she provides the necessary nurturing for the child to feel safe, build trust and develop a sense of worthiness. Of course, the father is extremely important in the upbringing too, and him not being emotionally attuned to the child, later on, is just as devastating. But the mother is the primary relationship when we come into this world.

What does the early absence of love truly mean?

When we are born, we are little beings, full of needs, and we are fully dependent on someone else taking care of us and meeting our developmental needs. We need to be fed, dressed, bathed, put to sleep, etc., but most importantly, besides the obvious needs for food, shelter, and safety, we need to be securely loved, positively mirrored and our caretakers need to be emotionally attuned to us. We need to be held, cuddled, loved, seen, validated, paid attention to, touched, looked at, talked to, and respected in our feelings.

In other words, our most prominent emotional developmental needs were:

• to be loved when and how we needed to be loved
• to be acknowledged, seen and validated in our being and feelings

If these needs were not met the moment we needed them to be met in a consistent matter, meaning if we were not consistently loved when & how we needed it, we were in deep pain and more, so we translated that into thinking that we are not worthy, we are no good. As a result, our self-worth could not develop, and we will keep feeling unworthy right into adulthood.

If our most prominent emotional developmental needs were not met in our early childhood, we translate that into thinking that we are not worthy, we are no good. Click To Tweet

The Sad Truth About Feeling Unworthy

Now here comes the sad truth: for most of us, this pure form of love has not been available. Most of us have repeatedly not had our emotional needs met when and how we needed it. Very early in life, we learned that our intrinsic needs for validation, love, and connection with one or both parents were not met. Many of us did not have a secure attachment and good bonding experiences and we were neglected, deprived, and abandoned many times. Sure, most of us had had the basic needs fulfilled, such as food, shelter, and safety. However, the subtler needs, such as deep connection, love, presence, care, and attention, were oftentimes completely absent.

Another thing that was truly missing for many of us is emotional support where we were helped in dealing with what we were feeling. Unfortunately, many of our parents have not learned that themselves which is why they did not know either how to deal with their children’s emotions in a healthy and constructive way.

Most of us never had anywhere to go with our feelings. Click To Tweet

The simple question of “How are you feeling today? Tell me all about it”, allowing us to share our feelings, our pain, frustrations, anger, sadness, or maybe insecurities for as long as we need to and in the way we need to express it, was pretty much unavailable to many of us. Most of us never had anywhere to go with our feelings. This lack of emotional support and attunement often created a deep feeling of loneliness and isolation because we are left to ourselves with what we were feeling and therefore carried those feelings resulting in emotional suffering.

So, in the interview, I will go on talking about how to heal the Psychological Mother Wound, why we might be afraid of doing the work, and a lot about Spiritual Bypassing. Apart from that, of course, there is going to be more for you to listen to. I actually have a free e-book ready for you as well!

Who is Pia Prana Muggerud?

Pia Prana is a Holistic Counselor, Coach, and BBTRS Breathwork Practitioner. Her work is about being real, so every step is about coming closer to realizing and standing in your own truth and share it in love, courage, and dignity. She is also a Learning-Love Teacher, work that brings awareness and acceptance to the wounds carried from childhood that affect our lives and relationships. She is also the co-author of the upcoming book “She rises for tomorrow – female entrepreneurs who brought ideas to life and inspire the world”. She is also a friend of mine, as we met each other on the beautiful healing and growth journey when we were both in India doing courses and seminars together. Let´s welcome her!

Hi Pia Prana, welcome on the show, and thank you so much for jumping on this call with me!

It´s such a pleasure and it´s quite exciting! You know, I´ve been doing all these interviews and now I am being interviewed. I´m totally thrilled to be here, thank you for inviting me.

You´re welcome! I´m sure our listeners today will get something very exquisite to look forward to, if we may say so, because you are organizing a summit which is called YOU ARE ENOUGH. Tell me a little bit about this summit. What is it about and what are the topics that your experts are going to talk about?

Well, the summit has kind of taken on a life of its own, but YOU ARE ENOUGH is something that is very, very close to my heart, and one of the things that I am really an advocate of is for people to feel OK when they´re actually not feeling OK, but actually the summit is here to remind you that in fact, you are more than enough!

What The Summit Will Be About

Right…and you have so many different experts on the show, and you actually cover – let´s say – a broad aspect of this idea of YOU ARE ENOUGH. Can you lay out a little bit the directions of your experts?

Yeah, sure! Well, when I initially had this idea and when I then finally decided on the topic – the overall theme of the summit – what I really wanted, was to get as much variety as possible within what the speakers were offering, and therefore we can really speak to a very broad perspective, the broad heart of our viewers listen to this. Maybe somebody right now is struggling and maybe they are an entrepreneur and they are stuck in their business. We got somebody to talk about that. And then we have got a couple of people that teach Tantra and Sacred Sexuality. One of them speaks about the importance of being receptive and learn receptivity. We´ve also got a couple of speakers who dive more into programming your mind through things like NLP or Hypnotherapy. We´ve also got a wonderful speaker who will talk about living fearlessly. And all of the speakers are not just speaking from their own perspective, cause, of course, we all have a personal story that we can tell, often it´s many. And each of these speakers will not just share their journey, but they are also offering tips and insights that you can use right now for your life. Which I think is really the most important thing, that you can take something away that acts like a in many different areas of your life.

Yeah, I can totally imagine, so what inspired you to actually do this summit?

Other than the topic being really close to my heart, I am also seeing now, that at the time of the summit, we are still very much right in the times of Covid-19 and many people are in isolation, many people are dealing with incredible amounts of change and uncertainty. And I think what people are used to, things only outside that helped them to feel good enough. Things like “I am going to hang with friends”, which is a wonderful way to remember like “see, I´ve got all these wonderful friends” or doing activities. Either being creative or interacting with others. Many things that we´ve used as tools to help us feel that we´re enough. And now all those outer things for many of us they are taken away or certainly they are limited. And so the summit is then a gift and a way for everyone listening to be able to have that reminder that “Oh, it´s actually all in me. I don´t need to go outside to find my worth. I can do many of these things on my own.” So, that´s the beauty of a broader spectrum of what we are offering and then actually that key reminder that you already are enough as you are.

Wow, okay. This is actually really awesome because my next question would be “Why is this summit so awesome for the listeners of my show?” And then you say “it´s all in me”, so I am feeling like as love addicts (I don´t want to label us, but you know, at the end that´s what this show is about). It´s all in me. So, in your opinion: why is this summit so awesome for my listeners?

Once we settle for less than what we deserve, we are just perpetuating the feeling of “I am not enough!” (Pia Prana Muggerud) Click To Tweet

I think at one point or another we´ve all been in a place where we´ve compromised and we just take whatever we can get. Even if it´s just breadcrumbs and I certainly also recognize myself in that, where I´ve also totally been a love addict and kind of going out and trying to hold on to something that I can´t hold on to. So, I think the summit is really also a reminder that once we settle for less than what we deserve, then we are just perpetuating the feeling that “I am not enough” and I have to keep going outside of myself to get what is inherently inside of me. So, I think the summit couldn’t be more perfect for your listeners.

I agree! And you know, I also want to quickly talk about the book that you are going to release. Because I think that could be interesting for my listeners too! Tell us about your book.

Well, it´s a collaboration with a few different authors. It´s called “She rises for tomorrow”, and when I got involved in this book project, I had already been working with the acronym “Rise” and the idea that we might be at some point or another we are going to experience that we fall down. That we have supposed failures, that things don’t work out the way that we had planned. Like Covid, for example, that is very real for everybody right now. And then this book is about stories of women, entrepreneurs, that have fallen, that have gone through even a dark night of the soul and found it in themselves going inside to find the resources that actually, “Yes I can even if it’s just I take on step after another, maybe that’s all you are capable at the moment but from there that movement brings something more powerful and then the learning of the supposed fall and failure, and she just feeds what they´re offering the world.

So, I am super excited and it should be launched, or published, next month, so December 2020 and I couldn’t be more thrilled and I hope your listeners would be excited to get a copy on Amazon.

That´s amazing because that is basically just after the summit. The summit is from the 1st– 15th December and what you and your experts are also going to offer, including myself, are free things/resources. What can we expect when we sign up for the summit?

So, the beauty is that it´s not just a free summit to you. You can listen to all about 25 speakers, the enormity of the resources, just in the interviews is incredible and I´ve been meeting these women and wow, there is so much value just in the interviews. And there also every speaker generously offered a free gift, so we´ve got different free meditations, which of course is a wonderful, easy tool to have at home. Then we´ve got free workshops that you can sign up for and actually participate in learning and taking whatever that speaker has brought to the table in the interview – integrating it deeper but actually going through the workshop situation. Then we´ve got free e-books, and we´ve got somebody offering a free breath-session. So you can actually have that in the privacy of your own home and go through the process as if you were there at a physical workshop. So many other free gifts as well. So, you get a huge bundle of abundance when you sign up for the summit.

That´s amazing! I really look forward to the summit and I will post the link for you guys to sign up in the show notes. I want to thank you so much Pia Prana, that you jumped on our call talking about this amazing summit. Why don´t you close with a powerful message for all of us before we end it?

YOU ARE ENOUGH, is an inside job! Click To Tweet

You know, we are all (maybe not all, but many of us) we are stuck inside right now. There is a lockdown in many parts of the world and we don’t necessarily feel like we have that freedom in our world as we had before and what I want to say and remind everybody is, self-worth and YOU ARE ENOUGH, is an inside job. It really is like “Oh it´s an inside job”! You can do this in the privacy of your home, in your office, whatever. The journey goes in here [editorial note: Pia Prana points to her heart].

That´s beautiful, you´re are pointing to your heart, Yes! Thank you so much Pia Prana, I wish you so much success for this summit that everyone comes on word and profits from all the incredible knowledge of your experts and yourself and your free amazing gifts and I wish you all the best! We speak very soon! Have a wonderful day.

Thank you so much! Thank you!

Take this opportunity! You don´t have to feel unworthy

Okay guys, so this was amazing! I just suggest you make sure to sign up for the summit, you´ll find the link in the show notes. And make sure to download your free e-book at theroyalpath.com/howtohealforgood.

I am so excited about the summit! I know you are going to learn a lot of things that will definitely benefit you on your healing journey. I am even more excited to bring to you more and more of the good stuff that helps you expand and in fact burn your childhood trauma and rise like a phoenix from the ashes of your own self. Just go and check us out on theroyalpath.com.

I am so happy to get to know you and I look forward to much more!

Have a wonderful day, bye.
Aleah Ava.

—